Taurus

April 12, 2009

There is much activity in your sign this month as the warlike Mars enters Uranus, stirring things up no end. Exert some caution in your dealings – especially with venomous creatures like spiders, scorpions and gay solicitors.

Fate comes with a golden clasp on its handbag.
Luck is stuck at home doing the ironing.
Don’t Forget: that dreadlocks are most unseemly below the belt.

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Words of Wisdom

Give a man a fire and he’s warm for a day, but set fire to him and he’s warm for the rest of his life.

— Terry Pratchett, Jingo

Top Tip!

  • Christmas Shopping

    Mrs Broadhurst reminds us that charity shops can be a treasure trove when present shopping. Semi-soiled nightwear, Jackie Collins books with the smut inked out, records of traditional Scots music… all have their fans!