Up the Junction!

To: Sarah-Jane Chlamydia Rossington-Smythe

Subject: Well, that didn’t work did it?

Chlamydia

Based on the unfortunate occurrences during our raid earlier this morning, I think we may have to reconsider our position. I am currently tending to our fallen and Ms. Zimmer who is still somewhat distressed and has once again taken to dowsing for her Aunt. She still indicates that Enid is in that particular area and keeps Sybilling “under the royal, darkness grows”. (Quite what this could mean I currently have no idea.)

Needless to say, last night’s endeavours made no improvement to our already frosty relationship with Transport for London. Miss Twigham’s activities, while incomprehensible, also caused much havoc with my ladies – particularly with Mrs Cathrall who would I’m sure, had the cold not already finished her off, been somewhat inconvenienced by her impalement on the scaffolding pole.

The fact remains, however, that after all the effort closing in on the area we found nothing but hundreds of vending machine fruit and nut bar wrappers together with grotesque amounts of molten chocolate, drool and impacted raisins.

At least we can take comfort from the fact that Enid is plainly not malnourished. The discovery of a couple of boxes of Terry’s Chocolate Gingers, however, bodes ill for the future.

We have to track her down! She can’t be far!

Words of Wisdom

Evil begins when you begin to treat people as things.

— Terry Pratchett, I Shall Wear Midnight

Top Tip!

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