Tiramisu, Aadvocat and Hecate

To: Marjorie Bathsheba Catheter Jodrell-Bentley

Subject: RE: Festive Celebrations?

Batty,

I had been wondering myself about how to dispose of Miss Twigham for the evening. The events of last new year – when she combined a box of Catherine Wheels and some industrial paraffin to devastating effect – even now occasionally cause me to wake in a cold sweat.

Thankfully since then she has generally restricted herself to drinking the stuff, which is a blessing. Although I do get a bit jumpy if someone offers her a cigarette.

It seems however, that she has played into my hands this time and managed to trap herself in the office safe whilst trying to steal a crate of homemade rhubarb wine.

The effect of the pneumatic drill we had to employ to release her – not to mention the wine she consumed – have rendered unto her a “stinking great migraine” as she put it, and she has retired to her sick bed for a few days.

All in all I consider it a most successful recipe. Even if she does occasionally blast the duvet from the bed.

Eleven PM sounds ideal for my similarly nocturnal ladies. I shall meet you outside Borough Market then.


I hesitate to ask, but will Ms Zimmer be joining us?

Clammy.

Words of Wisdom

On Being Old. It’s not nice but take comfort that you won’t stay that way for ever.

— J. P. Donleavy

Top Tip!

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