Spring Awakening

To: Sarah-Jane Chlamydia Rossington-Smythe

Subject: RE: Is all well?

Dearest Clams,

I think that would be a wise precaution after the casualties caused by last year’s “Greek Saga” theme. At the last count I think these totalled four ladies encased in concrete by Ms Zimmer as “Medusa”; several nasty bites by Mrs Pugh as “Cerberus” and the mysterious disappearance of Mrs Brazier. (And for that matter the Cerce’s Hog Roast was disgusting and exceedingly tough.)

I think a celebration of the two groups successes would be a better focus for this year’s festivities. Something joyful and up-lifting, perhaps?

Ms Zimmer has informed me that she may not be able to make the event on time due to “family issues”. I confess I am not unduly worried by this absence, however, as it undoubtedly involves Aunt Enid and I have found that particular person can be at her most trying when the sap is rising.

Yours my darling,

Batty.

Words of Wisdom

Give a man a fire and he’s warm for a day, but set fire to him and he’s warm for the rest of his life.

— Terry Pratchett, Jingo

Top Tip!

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